Proverbs 22:6 (KJV): “Train up a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not depart from it.”
What type of childhood would produce a narcissistic megalomaniac? If you’re not sure what a megalomaniac is, think Stalin, Mussolini, or Julius Caesar—charismatic leaders who wielded absolute power.
Megalomania is often characterized by delusions of grandeur and an exaggerated sense of self-importance. It can sometimes be associated with manic episodes in Bipolar I Disorder, where individuals experience heightened energy, grandiosity, and even psychosis. However, Cluster B personality disorders (“The Dramatic and Erratic” cluster) are far more prevalent and more likely to be associated with high-functioning business or political leaders. These include Antisocial, Narcissistic, Histrionic, and Borderline Personality Disorders.
Stereotypically, men are more often labeled Antisocial or Narcissistic, while women are more often labeled Histrionic or Borderline. However, the traits that propel men to positions of power do not seem to have the same effect for women. Antisocial men are more likely to end up in jail than in leadership. Borderline women, often shaped by significant childhood trauma, may struggle with instability that makes high-level leadership difficult. Histrionic men and women, though socially influential, often lack the gravitas to be taken seriously in positions of true power.
Narcissists, however, thrive in positions of authority. Megalomania and narcissism often stem from low self-esteem. The grandiose persona acts as a defense mechanism against deep-seated insecurities, rejection, or psychological wounds. Their exaggerated self-importance shields them from feelings of vulnerability and loss of control.
To understand how such personalities develop, we must look at their childhood experiences.
Parenting and the Making of a Megalomaniac
Overindulgence and Excessive Praise
When parents shower a child with constant adoration and praise without balance, the child may internalize a belief in their own inherent superiority. Overly permissive parenting—where a child is allowed to curse at adults or display disruptive behavior without consequences—can also reinforce a sense of entitlement.
Emotional Neglect by High-Achieving Parents
Parents who are too absorbed in their careers may neglect their child's emotional needs, leaving them in the care of rotating nannies or caretakers. Children who feel emotionally abandoned may compensate by constructing an exaggerated self-image, masking deep-seated insecurity with grandiosity.
Achievement-Based Worth
Some parents tie their child’s value solely to success in academics, athletics, or talent. If a child is only praised for winning, they may internalize the belief that worth is conditional upon dominance. This fosters a desperate need to constantly prove superiority to maintain a fragile self-worth.
Parental Modeling of Megalomania
A child raised by a domineering or narcissistic parent may simply mimic the behavior they see. If a parent demonstrates extreme authoritarianism or grandiosity, the child may grow up believing that power, control, and intimidation are necessary for success.
A Culture That Glorifies Power and Dominance
The larger society also plays a role in shaping a megalomaniac. A culture that glorifies wealth, power, and ruthless ambition reinforces the idea that one's worth is tied to status, control, and the ability to dominate others.
The Consequences of Megalomaniacal Upbringing
While many of these children go on to become successful leaders, the underlying insecurities remain. Their unchecked ambition, grandiosity, and lack of empathy can create destructive consequences for those under their influence. The world has seen the dangers of megalomaniacs in history—and continues to see them today.
So, the next time you see a preschooler dropping F-bombs in front an elderly adult
without consequence, consider this: Are they simply a child testing boundaries, or are they being shaped into someone who believes the rules do not apply to them?
Early influences matter. If we want better leaders, we must start by raising children who understand the balance between confidence and humility, power and responsibility, self-worth and empathy. The future of society may depend on it.
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